Time for the obligatory change....

Around every six months or so there's a big change in my life. It has been like that since 2003 more or less, and it's quite interesting. Taking me from Malmö to Stockholm to New York to Los Angeles back to Stockholm and then back to Malmö. In about seven months I'll be going to Vancouver. And right now there is going to be change as well:
I am to get my first own apartment since coming back from the States in little under two weeks. And I'm looking forward to it immensely.

Do I intend for my life every six or seven months be completely restructured? Not really acctually, it's just one of those things that happens unintentionally.

The effect of a life like this is on plus side that I get loads experiance and develop myself immensely! On the down side is that I cannot help but feeling alone.
I can be in a room with 20 people,. talking and having a blast,. but when it comes down to it; I am alone.
I dont invite too many people in so to speak, and those I do come about, they only surface once every two years or so and they have a tendency to not really appriciate it.

Have you ever gone through your "Contacts" list in your cellphone, trying to find "the" person?
I have.
Have you ever found anyone?
Or is it for you as it is for me; you know which person it is all the time, you mark her name in the list, but cannot press "Call".
Why I dont know, I just cannot press call. Its not fear of rejection, its not that I am afraid of bothering her. It's something else, but whatever it is,. it hollow and cold and leaves me standing there with a phone in my hand, thoughts in my mind and not a soul to confine to.

Something tells me I need to learn to live with my solitude.


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